Sometimes life isn't always what we hope it's going to be.
I'm a total Disney nerd. I cry in just about every animated Disney movie ever made. I heard the song for the opening credits of Oliver and Company, and I thought of those sweet little kitties on the streets of New York in the rain, and I started crying while I was waiting for my training to begin.
So even though I loved my job, my friends, my ward, my major, my apartment, and that super amazing choir I've been lucky enough to be a part of, I decided to give it all up to come here.
It was a scary decision, and for a while, I doubted the true value of coming here. True, it will look stellar on my resume, but considering the fact that my greatest dream is to be a wife and a mother, I didn't know if it was worth the sacrifice. As long as I'm not married, I've tried to prepare myself for a career. But as I've worked different jobs and thought about different paths, I've always known that I can't live my life doing something that I'm not passionate about. That's why I became so happy when I re-discovered my childhood dream of being an animator. I was so busy last semester, but I can honestly say that it's the happiest I've been since my freshman year at Snow College.
As I came here, I became so excited about the prospect of really believing in Walt Disney's dream for Disney World. He wanted there to be a place where families could be together and have fun together. What a wonderful dream. All I could think about was, "Now when do I get to help make some magic?"
I didn't know anything about my assignment to ESPN's Wide World of Sports. I'd never been there, and it didn't sound particularly interesting to me. I have no interest in sports. I even hate sports movies. But I decided to at least see what it was like out there.
First of all, my first day there was a Sunday, so I was already an emotional wreck, not only because it was the first time in my whole life that I've ever worked on a Sunday, but also because I had to miss church for it as well. I listened to my LDC CD from last year onto my MP3 player, and pretty much cried the entire hour-long bus ride there.
At first, it didn't seem so bad, but as the day progressed, I got more and more upset. This wasn't what I planned. There were no excited little girls in their princess dresses, no moms stopping everyone every five feet for a photo, no kids toting their Buzz Lightyear toys. Our trainer for the day showed us around and told us stories about famous sports heroes who had visited and how the baseball stadium was set up exactly like the Atlanta Braves stadium. He told us about the College Program participant who got chosen to be a bat boy for the Braves and how that made his dream come true. I was like, really? That has got to be the dullest thing I've ever heard. Who cares? It's a bunch of grown men who throw around some stupid ball.
Why didn't I get assigned to one of the parks? I felt like the assignment was random, and for some reason, I drew the short stick. My major is animation, shouldn't I be working at Magic Kingdom? Couldn't I go there and make someone's day? I came to make magic!
I was determined to get a transfer. I went to the office the next day to ask for one.
They don't transfer College Program participants. Your role is your role is your role is your role or you can go home. That's it.
I was heartbroken. I just wanted to come home and forget all of this ever happened. How could they assign me to the one place on the entire property that is the least suited to my personality? I told the man in the office that I wanted to go home, but that I was going to call my parents first, and think about it for a while.
While I was on the phone, the feeling just came to me. I knew I had to stay here. For whatever reason, this is where God wants me. How can I argue with that?
I started thinking about what my mom said about how the unexpected things in life are often the sweetest blessings. And I find in my life that's true. The things I never dreamed of happening are those things I hold dearest to my heart. I'm going to use my friend Landon as an example, since he's on a mission and probably won't ever read this. When he wanted to be my friend, I just wanted him to get away from me. I thought he had to be the weirdest person I ever met. But he was insistent that he wanted to be my friend. As I let myself open up to him, I found a whole other side of myself. And I gained a friend that I will never forget.
So, I don't know why I'm here, and I don't know why I've gotten this assignment, but I know that Heavenly Father knows I'm here. He knows the deepest, dearest wishes of my heart, and He wants me to be happy. And only He knows exactly how I will be the most happy. All I have to do is trust in Him, and all of my dreams will come true, even if they become different dreams in the end.
"Some wishes come true in the most unexpected ways." --Jiminy Cricket
